JLBC: Effective Communication
Our emotions are real. They create a need to “react” in a situation that faces us. When faced with a dangerous situation, it is the brain quickly telling the rest of your entire body that something is not right, and it is time to either run away or stand and fight. Emotions cannot be checked at the door and forgotten until the day ends. If you have a disagreement with your parents before school, the feelings around that disagreement influence your behavior for the rest of the day, possibly the week. They will affect what you hear, what you say, and how you behave. They will become barriers to understanding or sending a message.
People who have a high degree of emotional intelligence have a greater degree of influence. Their behaviors reflect that they are aware of what the emotion is that is present, understand why that emotion is there, and can separate the emotion and the reaction so they can manage the feeling rather than the emotion managing them.
There are five skills to manage your emotions: self-awareness, self-regulation, self-motivation, empathy, and effective relationships.
1. Self-awareness
Self-awareness is the ability to “feel” an emotion and understand its origin. Read the list below. JLBC Cadets, what would you feel if you were in the following situations?
• A slow line at the grocery store
• Making a presentation in class
• A surprise birthday party
• Being told on Friday that you cannot go to the ballgame on Saturday
• JLBC Cadets Receiving a phone call from
an old friend
Different emotions can happen in similar situations. The slow line may not be a problem if you are not in a hurry. However, add to that situation that you have only a few minutes to get home on time, or your parent will be grounding you for a week.
Now that you have identified the “feeling” that is happening inside you in those situations, think about the consequences those feelings might bring. For example, the slow line.
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